TRC Final Report

Volume 5

Chapter 9

Subsection 6

28 The testimony of Ms Beatrice Sethwale on the death of her son, a black police officer, also drew attention to the difficult challenge of reconciliation within black communities: between those who fought against the apartheid system and those who were seen as ‘collaborators’ because they participated in state structures (black councillors) or helped to enforce the apartheid system (black police, ‘kitskonstabels’ ⁶). At the human rights violation hearing in Upington, Ms Sethwale said:

On the 13th November 1985, it was a Wednesday morning. My son was driven out of the house by a crowd of people who were stoning the house. We were in the house, 405 Philani Street. He was driven out of the house, and shortly afterwards, he was killed and burnt.

Briefly, what I would like to say is that the effect of my son’s death has been great. I have been scarred by my son’s death. Shortly afterwards, I had to remove my children from Upington, and I had to enrol them at schools elsewhere.

In 1986 December, I went back to my home, and I tried to pick up the pieces of my life again. Thereafter, I had to hear from the people in the Paballelo community that I had shopped my son to the police, that I had betrayed him to the police and that I had been paid for doing so – that I had been paid for my child’s murder.

I went through a great deal of pain through all these years. It is now ten years and ten months and forty-three days ago that he died, but the pain is still with me. It still lives inside of me because the ‘whys’ and the ‘wherefores’ I still don’t know. Although there are some people who pretend that nothing happened; there is a peace on the surface. The pain which I suffered, well I think my second eldest son, the one just after the deceased, I think his drinking problem is the result of the death of his brother.

During the time that I suffered so much, I felt like I had been ostracised from the community, that I had been rejected by the people. I felt that I could not look the world in the eye. I should just accept things as the world accepted me. It was a great pain for me to move in amongst the other women in the women’s associations and groups to go and pray. It was always, it felt to me as if I was accused of this ‘Upington 26’ case. It didn’t matter to them what was happening to me. Their prayers were always plaintive. I always had to hear about the food that they were dishing out to their loved ones, never mind the ones who had died. Even the ministers were the same. Not one, I didn’t hear one minister praying for the deceased’s mother who had also suffered a loss, who had also lost a son. The pain has been living with me through all these years.

The court case was a long protracted one, and I had to suffer a lot of prejudice, and people swearing at me, insults that I had to endure. But the fact that I am sitting here today does not mean that I want to accuse anybody in Paballelo of anything. I was quite sincere when I spoke to you during the Court case after I gave evidence. I was given the opportunity to speak to you and I am, I still say to you, I am extremely disappointed in you people of Paballelo community. Paballelo is a small community. We know each other. We know each other very, very intimately, and when we speak of each other, we immediately know who is being referred to and I still say to you, “I am disappointed in you”. But there is nothing in my heart. I thought I just had to endure the pain and suffering that I was going through, but I still maintain that my faith in my fellow human beings has been scarred for life. I will, can never violate anybody else’s rights because you knew my son, Tsenolo Lukas. Some of you were his friends. But that means nothing. Talk will not bring him back.

My pain and suffering is still a reality, and that played a major role in that household because I don’t have a child in the Paballelo school. I would also have wanted my child to go to school there. I had to remove my children, and I had to go and live with other people. The hardship, the songs that you sang for me, that really affected me badly. It happened not that long ago. The last song was u-Jetta and that was such a bitter thing for me because some of you who sang that song, you go to the same church as I do, and some of you have very high posts, as you sit here. Some of you didn’t know what exactly took place that day, but you just felt that you could just ride roughshod over my feelings. You felt that you could sing that song, but when you saw me walking across the street you started singing this u-Jetta song. I laughed at you. I answered you and said Jetta didn’t hurt you, he is dead and that is nothing less than the truth.

Paballelo community, the community killed my child and they burnt him to death. That is the truth. Lastly, I would like to say thank you very much to the South African Police (SAP) who looked after me and my children as well during that time. Thank you very much. For the ‘Upington 26’ group I want to say it was a low blow, it was a heavy blow, but I picked myself up again, I survived. Thank you…

Commissioner Wildschut: [That is] why we felt it is important that you too have the opportunity to tell your story today. I think that many people say, looking back they acknowledge the fact that they didn’t give you that opportunity and didn’t recognise your pain and your grief. People are saying today that it is important for reconciliation and for healing to take place; that we begin to acknowledge that you too went through a lot of suffering. How do you feel about the fact that people are now beginning to say that they would like to work towards reconciliation first by beginning to acknowledge that you yourself have suffered?

Ms Sethwale: I feel I am already dead and that this process will beavery long and time-consuming one. It will take a lot of effort to make me entirely normal again because I have actually become quite used to my pain and place where I find myself currently. I don’t bear any grudges against anybody. But if you lose your confidence and your faith in other people, it is very hard to restore. My faith in my fellow human being has been shattered, but I don’t bear anybody any grudges.