TRC Final Report

Volume 5

Chapter 4

Subsection 8

■ FAMILIES

Disruptions to Family Life

73 In 1984, Mr Anton Lubowski became a publicly declared member of the South West African People’s Organisation (SWAPO). This marked the beginning of a road that led to tragedy, pain and suffering, not only for him but also for his wife, his children and his loved ones. At the Heideveld hearing, his mother, Ms Molly Lubowski, said he became a social outcast and was treated as if he had some kind of contagious disease. Mr Anton Lubowski was assassinated on the 12 September 1989.

74 As a core structure in society, the family should be protected and supported by the state. Apartheid generated a crisis in South African family life. Group areas legislation and forced removals have both been linked to disruptions in healthy family functioning, and the migrant labour system also deprived people of family life. Children were denied fatherly guidance and support during their formative years and the fact that women were obliged to take on domestic work meant that children were denied the care of their mothers. In trying to deal with these problems, extended family networks came into play.

75 The pressure on families was relentless. They experienced poverty and the degradation of living conditions in the townships, rural areas and informal settlements. Malnutrition was rife. Migrant labour policies meant that many fathers were away from their children for long periods and, perhaps more seriously in a patriarchal society, separated mothers from their children for long stretches. Even those parents who were able to live with their children worked long hours, sometimes leaving before the children went to school and coming home after they were in bed. In many cases, a traumatised child was simply an extra burden on the family; yet another problem for his or her already overburdened parents.¹⁸

76 In South Africa, the roots of violence were partly political, but were also exacerbated by demographic and socio-economic circumstances. Socio-political factors, such as the structural, economic, cultural and racial inequalities imposed by the former state, led to and exacerbated violence: According to McKendrick and Hoffman (1990) ¹⁹:

The objective conditions of inequality make it clear that South Africa is a highly stratified society, characterised by intense structural and institutional injustice and violence.

77 Constant exposure to violence may lead to desensitisation, a situation where a person may deny his or her feelings. Responding to conflict with violence became a typical, rather than an isolated, phenomenon. Violence in South African society is also reflected in domestic violence such as wife and child abuse.

78 The particularly grim situation in KwaZulu-Natal was described by Ms Nosimelo Zama at the Durban hearings on children and youth.

The stress on family life created by the constant pressure of the violence in this province cannot be underestimated. Children of depressed mothers would end up running away from home, because at home they are being neglected because their mothers are too depressed and sad to take care of them. Parents were separated in the violence; others were taken by the police and, up until today, they have never come back home. Children are now living with grandparents or sisters, and these people who are caregivers are facing problems because they can’t provide all the needs for these children.

79 The social pressures caused by apartheid and the repression associated with it have resulted in changes to the family structure in South Africa. Some families have been unable to withstand the pressure, whilst others have harnessed support and nurture from extended family networks to ensure their survival.